Today was a day of errands and research. I conquered the challenge of leaving my house to go get a bunch of grocery items —as if yesterday wasn’t enough. And when I say research, I mean 4 Chrome windows opened, with 26+14+42+8=90 tabs running. I just counted, and I am now mortified.
I feel like internet surfing is kinda having to cook and then do dishes overrrr and overrrr and overrrr again. You know? Like every time you eat, you leave a trace that you gotta clean up after, whether it’s a meal or a snack. If you don’t, it piles up, and then you gotta clean up the pile. And don’t get me started on my internet habits. The tabs are a perfect representation of myself, my thoughts (rabbit holes), and my state of being. Current status: real estate that I can’t afford, eye frames that I’m eyeing (!) without knowing what I’m truly looking for, a few recipes here and there, ways to preserve various fruits and veggies that I recently bought, school stuff, and finally, therapists. Obviously, I haven’t cleaned up after my thoughts yet.
This makes me realize why I’ve had chest pains for 2 days. I had come to the conclusion that it was anxiety, but now the anxiety has a face and it’s got 90 problems, and a bitch is one. Damn. I should’ve had 99 tabs opened. Get it?